The Chronicles of Starlight

A Thought on Benevolence and The Significance of Letting Go of A Temptation

2009-08-01T17:32:00.003+08:00

My last post was on July 1, exactly one month ago. It feels quite surreal to have this one month passed without you really being aware of it. Probably this is due to the three weeks of continuous midterms and assignments. And in between, there were tough and demanding lab reports. Thankfully, these come to a temporary halt, giving me some time off to relax and also to write a post for my blog. Though it is a short break, it is still very much appreciated.

All these while, I have a habit of doing some deep thinking, making reflections and virtually ‘re-experiencing’ some of the past and eventful episodes in my mind. This habit becomes more and more frequent ever since I first stepped into my university life. I must say that it is really fun because some of the sweet memories were revived. Simultaneously, I can learn or re-learn some of the valuable lessons so that the same mistakes will not be repeated again. Believe me; some of the past experiences of mine were awful but yet, it can actually be funny when I relived them.

There was one time when I asked myself about the kindness and benevolence that one person can actually give. To what extent, we can become a good and a kind person? Is there a boundary that defines the limit of us being benevolent? Can kindness be offered all the time, to everyone, and in every situation? The answer ‘yes’ for second question seems too ideal and cannot really apply in this realistic world; although I seriously wish it can actually be ‘yes’.

In fact, I realised that there is a price to pay for being too kind. The world is so realistic that you can never expect you will be treated the same if you are nice to another all the time. Certain people just love to take advantage of one’s kindness and we can only feel helpless and feel sorry for that kind person. At one time, I was persuaded to do one thing in which I did not really want to do it. However, I cannot be that bad to reject or to decline straight away for that person is a friend of mine. In the midst of much persuasion, I felt that it was not appropriate and it was not wise to say no. Later, I realised that I was wrong. I made a grave mistake that can spell danger to my studies. It was so unfortunate that this verdict cannot be overturned and I was made to regret it even now. If only I can become ‘heartless’ to that friend so that the decisive word of ‘no’ can be uttered out more confidently and firmly. I do not blame that friend. I only blame myself for being too kind.

This is just one of many experiences for being too kind in which at the end, I just laid myself into another complicated and intricate labyrinth of anger, distrust and regret. Well, it is not something uncommon to see one person, whom you never ill-treated before; turned his or her backside on you and walked off when you requested for help or his or her kindness. Such situations just made me wiser and I believe that benevolence should now only be given at the right time, to the right person and most importantly, in the right situation. I am not sure whether everyone will agree with me but I admit that I do believe in this strongly.

Recently, something has happened in which it almost bears resemblance with what I had experienced in the past, probably few years back. At one point, I am tempted to try on something which can be fun, exciting and happy. It can probably gives me the spark and drive that I never seen before in my life. Again, I realise that there is a high price to pay even before getting into that and I chose to resist this temptation. Looking at how similar it is with the one I experienced last time, I decided to let go of this temptation. The unnecessary stress, demoralisation, devastation and emotional strain are not the things that anyone will love to have them.

I may have chosen to miss out on this opportunity but yet, I feel it is the right thing to do. Grabbing this opportunity with strong iron grip can actually backfire where at the end; I will be left with nothing but pain. Therefore, instead of holding it with the strength of Hulk, I opened up my palm and let it go. I allowed it to go the way it should be. I will also not attempt to go further on intercepting the path of this opportunity as I believe that I am not the suitable or the rightful owner of it. This opportunity has its own right and freedom to find its right owner.

This short break lasts only awhile and I shall make good use of it. After this, there will be another round of midterms and ultimately, the final examination of this colourful semester. With that, I put another full stop on my posting.

Of Silent and Resilient

2009-07-01T13:14:00.009+08:00

Entering the Week 5 of Year 3 Semester 1, I can see some of us are getting a little bit restless. Assignments and reports are accumulating and some can be seen in having dilemma choosing their Final Year Project topics. For me, I am struggling in trying to complete the works. Efficiency is a word that somehow manages to evade me. Hopefully, I can get all the works done by this week so that I will have sufficient time to prepare for my two midterms in Week 7.

As the time passes through rather quickly, some other words came across my mind. 'Efficiency' unfortunately was not one of them. However, I realised these two words were equally important as well. 'Silent' and 'Resilient'. Both word have almost similar spelling apart from the additional prefix 're-' on 'resilient'.

Some may perceive the trait of 'silent' as weak, helpless, fragile and even pathetic. To them, being silent means being shut down and no longer able to fight.But I would rather call 'silent' as a strength. 'Silent' actually favours recovery. 'Silent' allows reflection. 'Silent' gives rise to calmness and peace. Ultimately, 'silent' brings on 'resilient' to you.

Once you are in the mode of resilient, you will feel the significant difference and improvement within yourself. You are more resourceful and have more solutions to solve problems. You will be more calmed while handling crisis or stress. Even if you got battered by problems after another, you can still get back to feet and stand up against them bravely.

Silent is the word I that I have understood long time ago. But as it came across my mind, it made me recall few other importance of it during these few days. Especially in some circumstances in which I believe I could not control or have very less role to play, I would choose to be silent. Although there is an urge within me to know something that can be rather interesting or happening, I will choose to silence all my efforts to get to understand what are they.

After all, knowing them may not give me or any of you any benefits at all and it can possibly result in a swift backlash from certain parties. Furthermore, the brewing joy and laughters could end in an abrupt manner if there are people who some deemed not fit to understand, attempted to gain access to the happening atmosphere. That is the point where we can see embarassment and awkwardness starts to build up.

Through some personal observations, knowledge-sharings and experiences, I believe the right way to handle these is by being silent. Being silent is good in a way that you can avoid being the culprit. If you do not understand, you should not to try to pretend to be understanding. Just let everything flows in a natural manner and you will find things are much much better without you knowing what is happening.

Yet, if you happened to be at fault, you should not perceive quickly that you were the one bearing all or most of the guilts for that situation. It is the situation that doesn't allow your interest or urge in your heart to have its own way. Having the interest is not wrong. But bear in mind, in some situations, never ever go further than that. You would not want to be the subject of embarassment and ridicule.

On the whole, being silent is actually good in some circumstances. Speech is silver while silence is golden. Walk the talk and not the other way round. If you talk, make sure it's significant and you must translate the talk into actions.

To digress a little bit on the discussion of silent and resilient, last night I celebrated my former TARC coursemate's birthday in Hometown Steamboat, Genting Klang. I feel glad to meet the old friends and 'jimuis'. Some of them are really best friends of mine during my TARC days. I do miss the time when I was at TARC.

Happy birthday to you, Leaf and I hope you will be endowed with great luck, happiness and health.

P.S: Huilu's mango cheese cake was just splendid. To be able to bake such a nice cake is actually difficult and I have nothing but praise for her efforts, skills and sincerity. Good job, Huilu!

Taking picture with the birthday girl, Leaf and her bf, Jizz and other boys. Where were the other girls? =x.. They were actually taking their turns to take picture with the boys. SO, the boys really had a tough time last night. And Jordan was right that we should charge each girl RM10 for taking picture with us..LOL

The First Week of Uncertainty

2009-06-05T15:01:00.005+08:00

Breathing and gasping for hope in the midst of uncertainty

The new semester has begun and without doubt, uncertainty and anxiety are looming around many of us. It is not an unusual sight to see some of your fellow friends sitting blurry and have no idea on what is going to take place later. It is not something uncommon to have many of your friends asking you this and asking you that.

Definitely, something has to be done to get everything under control. I, for once will not deny that I could not escape from all these as well. Especially being a group leader, I believe I need to play my part to calm the situation and to douse off the uncertainty so that my group members will no longer feel anxious. Whatsoever problems that can turn out to be chaotic need to be purged out. At the same time, I can take some break from the bombarding and non-stop enquiries about the timetable, the classes, the subjects et cetera. And I can move on towards my own personal goal without any hindrances.

That is why it is not encouraged to skip your first day or your first class or your first week. Otherwise you will have no idea at all of what has happened, what is happening, and what is going to happen. You will miss out important announcements too. Once you become disorganised, you could land yourself into bigger trouble and this will surely affect you throughout the whole semester.

As a group leader, I have responsibility to disseminate information. But bear in mind, you have the responsibility to yourself as well by getting the information at the first place. You SEE, HEAR and ASK at the first place. The group leader or even the course representative is like everyone else, a student. They need to sort out their own problems too during the first week and plus, need to get clarification over some unclear explanation and announcement from the lecturers.

So, in the future, try not to resort to blaming your course rep or group leader unnecessarily if whatever information that you want could not be delivered to you. This is especially true if you skip classes; be it during the first week or the weeks after that. One thing for sure, either as a group leader or a course rep, we will never evade our responsibilities to disseminate necessary information equally. It is just that some questions we are not sure about the answers, and therefore we have to say, “I am not sure”. After all, we are very much like you, a student.

For this semester, the number of students in my group has shrinked to 14. Two of my classmates have decided to stop their studies while another one has to repeat his second year studies in Kampar. I feel quite sad for the two who decided to discontinue their studies. Anyway, I respect their decision and I wish them all the best in the future. I would like to wish Huey Tee all the best in Kampar and I hope she stays resolute and never give up no matter how tough the going is.

For this semester, it is compulsory to take an elective subject. It is either you take the Organizational Behaviour (OB) or Entrepreneurship (Entre). I decide to choose the latter one. Some friends said that I love to challenge the difficulties and that is why I take Entre. Well, every subject you take has its own difficulties and heck, OB can be a difficult subject too. It is just a matter of interest that I take up Entre as I believe it is more related and relevant to what I want to pursue in the future. After all, I had studied most of the things in OB not once but twice. So, why not I study something new rather than repeating the same things all over again? Even if what most of my friends said about the Entre lecturer are true, I believe she will not be the worst lecturer I ever seen. Ever since the second year second semester, I have been mentally prepared to work on my own whenever needed.

During this first week, I also did something which I hope can fulfil part of my pledge to do more charity whenever possible. After all, Buddha asks its followers to accumulate more good deeds. However, I know someone will be unhappy with what I did. But I understand that and I will have no hard feelings for that.

Personally, this first week did give me some hints to be more alert and to pay attention to every single detail. Apart from that, there is a need to inject stability to all the things that can cause confusion and also to organize whatever that is disordered and messy. Never let yourself bewildered and become lost in the middle of nowhere. It is essential to know what are the things that you should and must do. AND….Never give up
p.s: I hope YP’s appeal will turn out to be successful.. All the best! I know this posting is rather lengthy..but if I do not write more, I am not sure when I am going to write again as I want to fully commit myself to my studies. Hopefully this semester is going to be a nice one and I can have some spare time to write ^^

The eve of the new beginning

2009-05-31T01:00:00.000+08:00

Having mixed feeling

The same feeling returns each time the new semester is going to commence. That kind of feeling is rather complicated and I would rather try not to have it. This is because it can disturb my jolly holiday mood. Anyway, such feeling comes naturally and there is no way I can try to stop it from coming.

Each time a new semester is going to begin, I will have some mixed feeling. It is not only that I need to put a full stop to my semester break. It is about reluctance. It is about avoidance. It is about anticipation. It is about excitement. Part of all these could be influenced by past experiences in which I hope some will not be able to repeat themselves again.

I hope I can step into this new semester with renewed passion and commitment. I strive to do much better than the previous semesters. There is no way that I will give up although the objective of getting to President's List is becoming more and more unreachable and difficult to be accomplished. I will still hold onto the resolution I made in the early of the year.

Yesterday morning I was asked to work. Saturday normally is a good day that provides great opportunities to do a lot of sales and to earn a lot of money. However, my day started off rather badly. Other brand counters such as Hugo Boss, CK, Issey Miyake, Gucci and Ferragamo had sold more than RM600 worth fragrances product each by 1pm. I only managed to sell a RM90 Armani Deodorant Stick.

By 4pm, some of the brands had reached sales amounted to RM1000. Giorgio Armani was still at RM90. I feared that this RM90 amount will not change and I would return home with extremely little earning. However, I did not give up. I approached as many customers as I could. Continuous rejection did frustate me. There were no potential customers at all. Many did not really buy into my idea of trying Armani fragrances.

At 6pm, I was supposed to pack my stuff and returned home. I decided to stay for few more minutes, hoping that I could sell at least a bottle and would not return home feeling despair. Around 6.03pm, miracle happened. A regular customer came in and bought three bottles of Armani fragrances worth RM785. I succeeded in doing 'chap set', a term coined by the fragrance consultants referring to selling a lot of perfumes or perfume sets at the same time to the same customer. I returned home feeling overjoyed.

What happened yesterday convinced me that as long we do not choose to give up, we still have chance to succeed. If we choose to give up, then your chance to succeed or to achieve what you want is equivalent to zero. Yesterday could be deemed by many as a small matter but the lesson behinds is truly a matter of utmost importance to me.

Never give up, people.. never ever give up..

I wish all my friends and coursemates good luck and all the best for the new semester. I believe that the new semester will promise more sparks, more momentous moments, much tougher journey, more difficult times and livelier 'DRAMAS'.. See all of you soon..

Facing the moment of truth

2009-05-27T12:37:00.011+08:00

The semester break I am having now is quite short. I wished it could be extended for another one week. Nevertheless, going back to school is inevitable and another gruelling semester will begin next week. And I will be in my final year.

So far, this holiday has been good. I am able to do things that I loved very much. I can meet up with some of my close and best friends for late night mamak drinks. Each time we went out for a drink, there will be a lot of laughters and entertaining jokes. I really enjoy it a lot.

Apart from that, I am working hard to make myself fitter by jogging in the morning and plus playing badminton with my friends. I am totally freshened up each time I sweat and I really feel good about it.

Watching all the downloaded drama series and movies is another good thing to do during this short holiday. I am currently catching up with E.U. Although the 'Laughing Gor' mania has considerably subsided, it is still an interesting drama to watch.

Besides, few days after my exam ended, my supervisor called me up and asked me to work. I agreed straight away for I can earn extra money. Therefore, I returned to the newly-renovated Parkson Sg. Wang as a part-time fragrance consultant again. For the time being, I have worked for six days. Though the sales during the six days were not that encouraging, I managed to break my personal sales record on one weekend in which I sold RM3.3K of Giorgio Armani. As such, the earning for that particular day was quite satisfying.

Furthermore, I can meet up some old friends and 'kakaks' in the fragrance department. The newly-renovated Parkson has brought up a new image and experience of its own. The fragrance department, particularly becomes brighter and it hopes it can attract more customers. Parkson has even appointed an efferminate customer service manager to lecture some of the staffs and promoters so that they can consistently give good customer service. But most of the staffs in the fragrance department gave thumbs down for that.

On 21/5, CCB, the self-proclaimed "K歌之王" challenged me for a PK competition in karaoke in Neway Times Square. The PK was judged by Kaiyik, who does not have any notable credential and remarkable achievement in music industry..lol.. My performance was not that good as I was not in good condition. However, the result was quite clear that day. But the result was changed after that. Kaiyik was probably under duress as CCB was the one who will drive him home. LOL! Nevermind that.

The next day, I watched Angels and Demons with some other friends. The movie was not that bad in which some of the events inside the book were omitted. Some of the characters were removed as well. The movie was a little bit too fast-paced and the flow of the story is not that smooth as the development of the story was not enough..Anyway, it is still ok and better than Da Vinci Code.

Singing with true feeling and by giving justice to the song as well

An act from a lunatic (LOL!): CCB went berserk.. suddenly kneel down and shouted his lungs out.. just kidding, CCB

CCB lied down on the sofa and sang using his infamous falsetto. Poor Kaiyik, he had to sit closer to capture this moment of madness

CCB and I sang together

Shuang and I after watching Angels and Demons

Meeting my 'little sister', Jess again in Parkson after didn't see her for a long time

Hmmm, getting to the main point, my holiday even though seems fulfiling and pleasing but still, there was no way I could escape from facing the moment of truth, the truth whether all my hard works pay off during last semester. I am not the best but I always keep fighting. I believe I worked harder compared to the first semester but I am not sure whether it's good enough to get myself to the result I desired.

The result tab has appeared one week before the result was even released. So, it kept us guessing regarding the date of the release of examination result during that period. After I returned from working last Monday, I got the news that the result is out but many could not check it as there was heavy traffic to access to the University Intranet.

Thus, I delayed checking of my own result for one day and I planned to check it yesterday. However, there was something bothering my mind. I was discouraged from checking my result by that. Word has it that many of my friends do not get result favorable to them. I am uncertain whether I am actually afraid but I hope I am not. I decided to delay for another day.

It is already three days (including today) after the result is released. I decided not to delay any further. Keeping on delaying is not a wise thing to do. The moment after I posted this, I shall go to the Intranet and check. All the best to myself..

The end just fell flat..

2009-05-13T21:17:00.007+08:00

Year Two Semester Two examination is over. Yes, it is over. But why it feels nothing at all? For the past few days, I have been waiting anxiously for yesterday to come. I was really excited but at the end, it is just empty. As empty as how Shakespeare portrayed, “full of sound and fury..signifying nothing”.

Anyway, it is something good to reflect on. I do not feel like wanting to celebrate in large scale over the end of the examination. I would rather take this very short break to rest and relax. I am not tired physically, it is just my mind that is jaded.

This second semester was actually a nice one. There were some positive improvements in myself although I know there are rooms for even more. I can see some paradigm shift within myself as I show more hunger, determination and commitment towards what I want. Hopefully, all these can be translated into an excellent result. Nonetheless, it would not be easy if I were to judge myself based on the recently-ended examination. I knew I could have done much better.

Yesterday, after the examination ended, Kaiyik and I went out for a drink with another friend, Skorpioni (he wants to be known like that, though we have a better name for him). We went to the Pak Li Café, to Jusco Wangsa Maju for mini- basketball game and to the Starbucks too. This outing was a little bit dull although we managed to break the 600 points barrier altogether. Yet, I want to thank Skorpioni for his willingness to come out and give us a lift. Thanks, CCB and I shall consider your invitation for a PK challenge.

Drinking the Lattes and Frappucino in Starbucks.. LoOked rather moody, aren't they?

CCB was probably tired after his personal morning 'romping' activities

Kaiyik was sitting like an Irish mob boss who imagined himself drinking an Irish coffee in Starbuck

Skorpioni was probably looking at some 'leng' lui outside

Thinking of something rather seriously

Hey, CCB.. you better make this looks good

Dozing off....

Probably Skorpioni thought this looks good on himself. 算了吧,CCB.

Tips on how to identify the slimeballs

2009-04-12T01:19:00.008+08:00

Our life can be very much influenced by the people we meet everyday, either the good one or the bad one. I do agree with a maxim that life can actually be dull and rather monotonous if the bad ones extinct. This is because it is pretty difficult to learn some valuable lessons and experiences if there are no assholes and jerks in your life.

Few months ago or rather recently, I found out that a new breed of the bad ones has emerged. They are called the 'slimeballs'. These slimeballs are sometimes known as the scumbags. Therefore, it is with pleasure to share some of my experiences from my encounter with these slimeballs cum scumbags with all of you including the tips to identify them.

The first symptom is pretty obvious. A 'slimeball' can proudly proclaim himself that he is likable, lovable and endearing to many people surrounding him. He will not feel ashamed to tell you that many people really like him and enjoy having him as company. Oblivious to him, this slimebag actually has many people disliked and despised him at the same time. Well, it is not unusual to have people dislike you at times. But, since this slimeball has the audacity to announce to the whole world that many people like him, then the issue of having many people disliking him becomes much more significant.

Secondly, a slimeball can claim he treats every single person sincerely. However, this slimeball can turn out to be the worst hypocrite of all time by befriending the people who only has '利用价值'* to him. For example, he will feel it is ok to have the friend to do all his important works for him while he is away to enjoy and relax his badly-formed ass elsewhere. So, is this what you called 'sincere', slimeball?

Thirdly, a slimeball likes to find satisfaction by mocking a person that he feels has different view with him. He enjoys a lot in creating a sensation out of himself by mocking and ridiculing someone. But this slimeball should be beware of mocking the wrong person. This is because he could be made to regret all over his next stupid and unintelligent action.

Fourthly, a slimeball more or less does not respect the existence of differences in view. He does not really like the idea of each person is entitled to his or her opinion. He will feel that if your opinion or view does not sound nice to hear, he will not hesitate to said in a pretending manner,"oh, enough enough...i respect your view,i respect your view".

Next, this slimeball truly believes he knows best of what things shud be done, what is right and wrong, what is the appropriate action or behaviour and also morality. Furthermore, he loves to boost that he has the experience for this and that. So, once he is dissatisfied with what you do, he will chide you off. This slimeball also dares to utter out the line," I think I should not teach you anymore about this.." . You teach people, slimeball? Really funny. Probably he thinks he is on par with the moral guru and religious scholar and this qualifies him to teach people. In fact, most of his action and behavior can be disputed at their best. This slimeball himself is also a question of morality. Hmm... I,myself do not dare to teach people as what a slimeball does except on academic stuff when my friends asked me. Other than that, I am willing to offer only my humble advice and NOT teaching if they are facing problems in determining their appropriate actions and behaviours.

Usually, this slimeball's working attitude does not impress many people. However, we cannot come into a quick conclusion that the works of slimeball are poor and lack of quality. Some of the works are actually good and are acceptable. There are just few things that made him being turned off by people who could have worked with him. For instance, his absence without any valid or without logically accepted excuses which made other people feeling insecure towards him. Or maybe the way he conducts his work for example, being cincai,tak apa and last minute. These are just only few examples.

So, what should we do if we meet slimeballs? Well, I feel that if the slimeballs do not take advantage of our patience and tolerance towards them,it is still ok. However, if they crossed the limit, we should say ENOUGH is ENOUGH. Preferably, we make them keeping their feet onto the ground and make them regretting all over the annoying words they had spoken plus the actions that they done.

That's all for the posting. Any feedbacks are welcomed. Cheers... ^^

*利用价值 - The values you possessed which are useful. Once you no longer have the values, you are totally useless

Making a comeback..

2009-04-07T20:30:00.006+08:00

This is another return from another long hiatus.. I have been busy since the beginning of the new semester and it seems that I cannot commit myself fully to blogging if I want to do well in studies. This posting however, is just a little attempt to get back in touch with my favourite pastime. I do that I hope can post even more though it looks difficult as I will be facing my final semester examination within two weeks.

Quite a few remarkable things had happened ever since my last posting. The notable one was my appointment as the new Group 3 Leader replacing Suren, who resigned citing that he could not cope with the burdens of studying, working in Starbucks, teaching part-time tuition so on and so forth.. It was quite awkward having me to be appointed in a Catch-22 situation. The group will be doomed if there was no suitable person taking up the leader position. And I myself will be doomed even further if my studies were the first to be affected plus getting unnecessary pressure if I am not doing well as G3 leader.

I was quite reluctant but I humbly accepted the job with sense of responsibility. After all, the support is genuine. So far, most of the G3 members gave their cooperation in which I appreciated that a lot. There were only few cases that there were people who tried to create some 'situations' that were truly uncalled for. I will remain a low-profile leader and execute whatever tasks I need to do. Surely, if anyone try to manipulate or try to use me to achieve their personal agenda, I can only tell them to "get lost and get out of my face".

The picture of Group 3 of the Biotech 05/07 Y2S2 during Tweetie's birthday party. Everyone was present except Suren

To be fair, this semester is much much better than what I expected. The lecturers are truly kind and I am really grateful. I find myself to be even more committed to studies and I try real hard to improve my time management. I try to make good use of the time I have to study and also to play, to relax and to grab some wink whenever I can. I even resort to revising notes when I am on my way home in LRT. Some warned me of the risk of getting crazy and lunatic for studying too much but I do not heed that. This is because I know that I do not want to have the 'regret sickness' as suffered by many throughout this semester. And I am still very much normal while they are ruing for their mistakes and misses. Serve them right? I do not know. They know themselves better.

Ups and downs, happy and unhappy stuffs are all normal and nothing unusual. It's just a few 有居心的人 (people with some personal agenda) who annoyingly and purposely love to make things uneasy for me. I hope that I can meet more 贵人 (people who bring luck) for times to come.

The most fertile season for acne growth has actually started very much earlier, even before this new semester begins. I expect this season will be prolonged and extended for weeks to come. Too bad.. the final examination is coming soon..Wish everyone good luck for that in advance. The next posting should be something exclusive and probably worth to be given a little thought or two

Posing after Moral presentation. From left: Ying Li, me, Kaiyik, Yee Wei and Joe

Striking a cool pose

My Reply to comments on Dear Mr. Potter

2009-01-30T02:00:00.001+08:00

Last week or maybe weeks (remember I went for my 'hiatus' until I do not have time to update my blog?), my previous post "Dear Mr.Porter" drew rather fiery remarks although there are only a few of them. At first, I thought I would like to give a real lengthy reply to each of them. But I stopped at that considering my rest is far more important for the time being..LOL

To Meiyi:

I need and I always welcome comments with open arms whether they are favorable to me or not. Besides, being in someone else's shoes is not something that I would reject and it could be very useful in making my judgment towards one thing. What I said in my post was mainly used to highlight the sheer confidence (that is possibly) displayed by Mr. Potter based on one of the six interpretation that being in someone's else shoes is the rightest thing to do without having any room for us to have any doubt on that.

Seriously said, you are true that sometimes there is NO situation from 3rd person's point of view. Probably because I think too much that time under heavy stress and turbulent mind. Probably it is also because that situation had only little or no effect at all on the 3rd person.. Winning and losing plus right or wrong issue would be a long winded discussion. Being the one who clarifies to clear out misperception may make me looked defensive all the time. Well, personally I feel that if my efforts to explain is equalled to being defensive, then why not? The truth is at times, there are people think that I am wrong ( in reality, I never deny that what I did sometimes were wrong). So, I would love to convince them to either have a second thought by offering my idea and argument before they make a full judgment.

Surely, I love myself and my life a lot. You are right that beating myself with depression will not be a good idea to treat myself. And you symphatized me that I do not know how to love my own life. Hmm, that's a big statement. Well, it's up to you to think how I treat my life. What I can say is that whenever I am in my lowest ebb, I will search for the solace within myself in which I succeeded in doing that last sem. That solace will generate a lot of power to spur me on even though the going gets tough on me. I may not be happy at times while pursuing my ambition. But that is parts and parcels of life and the unhappiness I had will make me even stronger. Without doubt, you will find yourself in a state of sadness in which after that you will try your very best to channel all your sadness and to alleviate it. Probably all the experience that I have all this while will be useful to other people in which I call it as an act of sharing like how you proposed to me.

Finally, I do not think your comment were insulting. I find it enlightening instead and a refreshing one. I may disagree with you at certain points but I do not think that will stop me from thinking that your comment is one of the best I ever received. Banging you back is never an option in this case because you offered your sincere and frank thought. Thank you for willing to be my listener..TQ

Lastly, to the very Mr. Potter himself:

Firstly, I am sorry if you felt that highlighting some of my writings with red with direct reference to you was offensive. Next time (if there is really next time), I will try to make it pink for you. Pink could soften up things for you.

You actually think that I am angry thus, I came out with the post about you. Well, the truth is going fully no holds barred in one's writing most of the time will create a perception that he or she is being angry. I don't think you could notice one or two sarcastic elements insid my post.

You do not have to resort to stop giving me comments. I accept comments not only in terms of accepting the existence of the comments. Sometimes,I accept and take note of the comments or shall I say, criticism if I find it suitable,correct,useful and purely true to the situation. Or maybe I accept only at the later stage probably because I could find it not relevant now but realise later on that it is true and should be noted.

It is incorrect for you to say that once I put up the post about you, I will be afraid that I hope you will never get to read it. The fact is once I put it up, there will be no turning back and I will not feel regret putting it up. I hold myself responsible to all my posts without fear or whatsoever.

You are sad and you felt that we cannot be good friends. Well, I for sure,can say I never bear any grudges against you. I may be unhappy with you sometimes but that doesn't mean I have reasons to not being a good friend to you. Perhaps, you know the reason for your part.

What we pursue in our life is different. That includes the way we pursue it. The differences can really be a headache to both of us. I can say that I am a task-oriented person and maybe you are more to the relationship-oriented kind. I may take a more serious approach in the way I do things whereas you may prefer a more relaxed, unwinding and simple way to get things done. The method we use should not be the reason to drive us apart. It should the reason for us to strike a balance and lest we may find a common ideology together. It is always up to you whether you accept the idea of diversity or not.

Thanks alot for your nice CNY card.. It is a nice CNY greeting from you. 恭喜发财。。祝你永远会快乐

The Posting for CNY

2009-01-29T21:07:00.000+08:00

I'm back after weeks of hiatus with this new post which is also my second post of the year. For the past few weeks, I spent most of my time warming up myself for the new semester so that I'll not suffer any 'shock' in the later phase of it. Plus, not to forget, celebrating Chinese New Year with my loved ones..

Yup,the first two weeks of the new semester went quite well so far..much better than what I expected but nevertheless, I cannot afford to let my guard off and I know that hard work is crucial. After all, I found out that my 'gene of procrastination' is still very much expressing and I have yet to find the way to silence it...duh..

I'm afraid that it will keep on expressing after CNY. That will spell more than a threat or danger to my journey towards achieving my target for the year 2009. Anyway, I have bound myself tightly to my pledge and my resolution and I pray that my own hard will, hardened by spirit of resilience, will stop the gene that express the protein of procrastination in my body.

I attended my last lecture before CNY last Thursday 22/1 evening. The subject was Moral Studies. So, more or less you can expect what happened. Evening lecture and it was the last lecture..The pictures below explain everything.

The new boy of the house, Mighty Joe Young ''beh tahan liao''..Dozed off in the middle of the lecture.. Kaiyik(left) couldn't stand either

Tweety Bird couldn't resist his evening lecture nap under the cold condition.. he leaned his head on my shoulder and I allowed him to do so albeit reluctantly..XD XD .. FYI, I wasn't sleeping..if I slept,how could this picture be taken by myself.Probably it was a snapshot that managed to capture the slit-eyes moment of mine..

Happy Chinese New Year to everyone once again..May the Year of Ox bring lots of love, peace,luck ,joy and happiness..Not to forget, good health and unlimited wealth followed by success and excellence..

Dear Mr. Potter

2009-01-10T13:59:00.008+08:00

The Hero

Surprisingly, this is my first post of year 2009.. I have no idea too why it took me 10 days for me to come out with my first post for the new year. The new semester will begin real soon which is next Monday 12th of January.. The fact that I have to go back to school is inevitable but frankly speaking, I try my best not to think about it for I know it feels really terrible. Recalling the past experience made things even worst.. Therefore I would not reject any call before 12th of January from my supervisor to ask me to work.. At least, working will distract me from thinking about going back to school.

I am not lazy nor I hate going back to school. I am just doing my best to alleviate all the sufferings. Nevertheless, I am pretty sure that I am more or less recovered from the jaded condition I had last time. It is just that I hope I would not go all over the sufferings again.

Anyway, anyhow.. I know I cannot run away. The journey towards my ambition must be continued. I must adhere to The Declaration of StarLight 2009 although I know the next semester will be even more unforgiving, cruel and zero sympathy as what I said in one of my December 2008 post - Reflection so far....The Transitory Period Towards The New Hellish Period of Time.

Two days ago, I had a rather short but interesting MSN conversation with a friend (I hope this term is sufficiently appropriate). In this blogosphere, for certain occasions or situation, I believe the identity of someone should remain low-profile out of respect to him or her. Unless situation needs you to do so, I will not reveal his or her name unnecessarily.

So, with all due respect to him, I better acknowledge him as Mr. Potter. First of all, I would like to express my gratitude to Mr. Potter for taking some interest on my blog. I am grateful and humble because you are willing to part off with some of your precious time reading my postings. I am humble too because you praised me for the good language I used. You mentioned too that you love to learn from me in many aspects. Well, I replied that we always need to learn from each other in our life.

One of your statement, however really amazed me. This is because if it is not clarified meticulously, it will come out with many and different interpretations. Our conversation came into the part where it touched on some of my postings related to my view and my perception. Mr Potter, you said ," If you think in other people's perception, it will work better for you".

Hmm, I do not have chance to seek further explaination from you, Mr Potter as you said you were a little bit busy and need to finish your own action plan for the year 2009. I do not wish to ask you the next time you appear online for I fear that we could engage in a fiery war of words based on the previous experience we had in which you lost your cool and labelled me 'disspeakable' and accused me of being arrogant ,so on and so forth. I was still cool and calm at that time and I prefer to use more diplomatic and gentlemen manner to solve the problem.

The highlighted statement of your could be interpreted as:

Most of the time, I never think based on other people's perception. I do not even give a damn to others and do not even care of their feeling.
All the while, what I did was not really right and that contributed to most of other peoples' and my own unhappy and bad experiences.
By being in your or other peoples' shoes, it will be one of the rightest things to do and it will bring more favourable and positive results.
I perceived that my perception and my judgment were always the right and your and other peoples' were always the wrong. Therefore, I was the cause of dissent of many people and brought many disruptive effect to the system.
You are the good guy and I am the bad guy for most occasions.
Your and other peoples' judgment and perception or maybe in some ways, the way you do your work are undoubtedly and undeniably, the good one and the appropriate one.

The list could go on and endless.. However, I believe the six interpretations above are more crucial and could be as what you think, Mr Potter. It could be all or it could be some of them. Other people might say I think too much or whatsoever. Maybe or maybe not simply because I do have the time for that. Still, I am pretty confident I will get some or maybe all the six interpretations correct to your sense, Mr Potter.

Well, Mr Potter.. you once claimed yourself to be a person who understand others really well. You said you are the most open-minded but at the end, you are not as what you claimed you are.

I do not mind you utter that statement out. I do not mind for you said," I said all these because I assume you are my friend". I am thankful but still, you acted and based some of your judgment based on other chaps and Joe's, Dick's and Harry's thinking and perception. At the same time, you indirectly influenced others to think like you do. So, how could you claim you understand someone really well? What you understood was mostly other peoples' understanding. Not totally yours. So, do you think it is fair?

With all due respect, Mr Potter, I never said and never claim my judgment and my perception are the most correct and the best. Who can determine what is correct and what is not? No one. Only situation can deem which is more suitable,which is more ethical and which is more appropriate. I am not the situation. I am just part of the entities that exist in the situation. So, it is the situation that decides which idea should be used, which perception is the most well-accepted etc. For your information, I never use 'iron claws and fists' to force people to accept my idea. I SUGGEST rather than I force.

Furthermore, Mr Potter, judgment varies and changes according to situation. You may say this is wrong today. But tomorrow you could say it is correct. Entities involved inside a situation can perceive something as X. However, entities outside the situation can perceive it as Y.

Mr. Potter, I hope you do not think me as someone inconsiderate as you can think of. I never said no when you asked me whether you can sit beside me during the Pengajian Malaysia test so that you can copy my answer. I am not someone who never think of other peoples' feeling. I am always willing to apologize should I do any wrong and hurt someone.

Moreover, if I really and totally follow what you or other people want without my own judgment and reservation, I am afraid what happened in the past will turn out much worst and bring even more disastrous effects. If you do not believe me, you can try to take a look who suffered and rued a lot over their first semester examination result.

Once again, I am afraid that you, Mr.Potter will resort to accusing me of being arrogant and trying to show off that "My result is the best", "I am better than all of you" and so on and so forth. My result is nothing to show off compared to the other more excellent coursemates. I am really dissatisfied and disappointed with my own result but I am thankful I am slightly unscathed. Never in my intention that I want to dangle my result slip on your forehead to show that I am better than all of you or because I am better, I am correct. The situation here had just proven that my decision and what I did for the last semester enabled me to escape from an even more disastrous effect.

Judgment and perception always change and vary. What are more permanent are actually our own ideology and stand. Saying that doesn't mean that the latter will not change. They will, albeit with slower pace and indirect method. I can accept difference in ideology and stand exist in each one of us,but do you, Mr Potter?

Just because you and I sometimes do not share common goal and ideology doesnt mean that we have to build negative perception on each others. I always embrace the idea that diversity enable us to learn different things from each other and also that difference in ideology should not be a reason to widen the gap among each of us.

At the end of that conversation, you REMINDED me to remember what I said about the difference in ideology should not be a reason to widen the gap among each of us. I told you at the end, you SHOULD REMEMBER it too..

I am sorry if you think I put you in a spotlight or whatsoever, Mr.Potter. I believe you and I are mature enough to think which can be hurtful and which cannot. All the best to you for the new semester.

The Villain

2008 Review and My New Year Resolution

2008-12-30T23:32:00.003+08:00

Looking forward to the StarLight

Welcome 2009, Goodbye 2008.. Many people anticipate the coming of New Year with making New Year resolution. They always hope for things will get better for them in the new year. Besides, some will pledge to change and to discard their old habits in their process of turning over a new leaf

Yup, you keep hearing people making resolutions. The question now is not, “Have you made yours?” .The focal point now should be adjusted to, “If you have made one, will you stick strongly to it? “Will you abide by it and change yourself to become better?”.

These questions will always linger in the mind of those making resolution regardless of whether they do take notice of them or they do not.

Many things happened in the year of 2008. Some of them were totally unforgettable. I can remember some of the ‘golden lines’ uttered at me vividly. I can still clearly remember many incidents that occurred too. Surely, I could not recap every single significant event took place in 2008 in this blog. Instead, I can only try to review some of them.

Looking back in year 2008, one of the most remarkable achievements of mine was graduating from TARC and obtained Diploma with Distinction. Besides, I also received the Book Prize from the college too. However, the good days did not last forever and the wheel of fortune spinned in the direction against your will.

I joined UTAR in May and I knew it will not be easy for me. I suffered quite a lot especially during the first few weeks. The red tape and the bad management made me feel almost unwelcomed. My patience and emotion were almost stretched to the limit. To add salt to the wound, I wasn't allow to undergo industrial training in which I felt it almost defeated my purpose to study biotechnology in UTAR.

Furthermore, I can still recall the experience in which I was told this by a lecturer after asking some questions.

“If I answer you and tell you, it will be very unfair to those students who do not ask!”

So, using your rationale, surely you will agree with me that this statement does not really make sense. If I want to follow my heart, I would say, “If they do not ask, it's either they understood what you were teaching or they did not dare to ask at all.”

However, I knew the tide was against me and I had no choice other than to accept the things that happened. I respect the lecturer for the qualification and the experience she possesses. I respect her for the knowledge she has. I knew she wants us to work independently and work on our own. I knew she doesn’t want to spoon-feed us which in turn is a very good thing. But I believe she can be more diplomatic in her stance. Anyway, she provided a good training for us in terms of facing harsh conditions or harsh employers.

It took me quite a long time before I managed to adapt to the environment in UTAR.

Besides, I had few clashes with some of my campus friends resulting in many uneasiness and conflicts between me and them. Misperception, baseless accusations and unscrupulous remarks were everywhere. All these were absolutely difficult to go through but at the end, I found my solace within my heart and it gives me strength to carry on.

Later on, I have a peaceful time and that is the happiest period of my life in the year 2008. Never had I felt so peaceful and free from all sorts of unnecessary stress. It liberates me from the pain I suffered during the first semester in UTAR. That is during my working days in Parkson Sg. Wang Plaza starting from 19th of October until 24th of December (There will be some ‘encores’ too). I meet many new friends and it gives me a new lease of life. They were really nice and I found something really special within them. Especially from the new female friends, their attitude impressed me the most.

Surely, I hope for things to get better for me in the 2009. However, I know that if I want that to take place, I need change. Even if it’s a drastic or dramatic change, I do not mind.
Allow me to unveil my new year resolution in which I acknowledge it as “The Declaration of StarLight 2009”

THE DECLARATION OF STARLIGHT 2009

“ I pledge to obtain excellent results and grades in all the tests, reports, assignments and examinations that I will be having in the year 2009. I will do whatever I can in order to ensure myself well-placed in the President List by the time I graduate in May 2010.
I will work real hard and use whatsoever methods to achieve my objectives as long it does not go against my conscience.

I will discard my bad habits. There shall be no more rooms for procrastination, mediocrity and laziness. Failure is never an option and there shall be no excuse should that occur. Time management must be improved by leaps and bounds.

Besides, I will pledge my commitment to achieve the RECONCILIATION OF TRUTH. I will bridge the gap of understanding with others and I will clear all the misperceptions and the misunderstandings as well. I am open to constructive discussions and I am looking forward to build good relationships and friendships with my friends, the people that I know and possibly, the people who are destined to know me.

I will also try my best to enrich my life with new experience and knowledge. I will not let my life becomes static and dull. Plus, I will silence all my doubters and prove them wrong.”

Happy New Year to everyone.. May all of us will have a nice year ahead and we shall be blessed with good health and luck.

Good Memories in Fragrance Dept Parkson Sg.Wang Plaza (Part 2)

2008-12-26T10:26:00.011+08:00

Christmas euphoria fills the month of December. It is always beautiful and a rather peaceful as it brings some kind of significant meaning to people either you are a Christian and non-Christian.

Sungei Wang Xmas Look

~Sweet pictures~ :-):

Kitson and Vivi, while having break time in Leo's Cafe in Low Yat Plaza

Kitson and Vivi, another closer shot

A shot taken from above

Kitson and Vivi, posing in front of one of the Christmas trees placed in front of the entrance in Low Yat Plaza

Kitson, Vivi and Khoo, posed together before going back to work :-D

(22/12) Naughty naughty Jess..She asked me to go inside the fitting room together when I request for a photo shoot with her

(22/12) Kitson and Jess

Oops! She accidentally bluetoothed in this picture into my handphone. Hmm, accidentally or purposely? LOL

(24/12) Jess, Kitson and Vivi.. This picture was taken in front of the Anna Sui counter where both Vivi and Jess worked there. 24/12 is considered as my last day..

(24/12) But of all pictures..I love this the most.. It is really sweet and I think it is befitting farewell for me to be able to capture such a sweet moment

One question remains unanswered... Sometimes, certain concerts have an encore session.. So will I have an encore session for myself in the Parkson Sg. Wang Plaza?..Only God knows..

Good Memories in Fragrance Dept Parkson Sg.Wang Plaza (Part 1)

2008-12-25T22:39:00.013+08:00

Yesterday can be considered my last day of working in the Fragrance Department in Parksom Sg. Wang Plaza.. Surely, i felt rather sad to leave the place that helped to heal my jaded soul and also that helped me to recover emotionally. I had so much fun working and the earning wasn't bad either.

I will miss the colleagues and the new found friends as they have been really nice to me throughout my two eventful working months. The good memories of these will always remain in my heart forever and I shall never forget them.

I managed to capture the good moments in photographs and my blog will be the media that helps me to vent and express my feeling be it happy or sad.

Tired look after coming back from working:

My main perfume counter: The island of Multibrand- Giorgio Armani, Diesel, Cacharel, Guy Laroche

Another counter of mine: Ralph Lauren

Good memories with colleagues and friends:

(17/12) Together with my brother in arm, Khoo on the last day of Ralph Lauren-Giorgio Armani promotion

(17/12) With Kak Ina who works together with me during the promotion

(17/12) Kitson and Joey whose Lancome promotion ended on the same date and it was her last day there as well

After watching 'Ip Man' 10pm show in Berjaya Time Square on 19th Dec..'Ip Man' is an absolutely brilliant masterpiece of martial art movie:

Time Square X'mas Look

(19/12) Kitson, Jeno and Khoo

(19/12) Kitson, Su Li ( Khoo's gf) and Khoo

(19/12) A rather stupid look of Santa..XD XD

There shall be more in the Part 2

A Sad Christmas Confession

2008-12-22T00:13:00.000+08:00

It looks like the happy days of mine are numbered. Sooner or later, I need to quit the job in which I love so much and continue my second year second semester studies. I do not have any choice other than to painfully see myself finishing my last few days job in Sungei Wang.

Hmm....the more I write, the more painful I am. However, should I fail to carry on, I am afraid that the pain I am having will get even worse in the future. I will miss all my friends and colleagues sorely. I will miss the peaceful atmosphere in my working place. I will miss the excitement of opening each bill for every perfume sold. I will miss the break time I have with my friends there.. I will miss everything there.

Seeing myself leaving a place with such a peaceful and serene surrounding for a place with troubled, stressful and unforgiving atmosphere is absolutely and definitely difficult. Furthermore, the pain is even unbearable especially I realize that I have to leave a beautiful garden even though with only few gorgeous roses for a garden filled with a lot of complicated-looking and annoying roses. I cry silently within my heart whenever I think about that.

I know I need to see things more than that. I know I have something more important to pursue. I couldn’t trade a successful future with the happy days I have during working. After all, it will be absolute stupidity to do that. But anyway, please allow me to express out my feeling whole-heartedly.

Thank you so much, Abang Dean for helping me and teaching me a lot of things. You made me adapt to the job easily and I can earn money without any much hindrance. Thank you to other kakaks (Kak Rozana, Kak Sheila, Kak Nor, Kak Lina and Kak Rosy) that helped me as well and I really enjoy my conversation with all of you. Thanks to Auntie Christina as well and I am grateful for your willingness to spare me one of your Lab Series facial scrub tester.

And this is the most difficult part. I would like to say heartiest thanks to the new brothers and sisters I met while working. All of you have really been kind to me. I never regret mingling and mixing with you guys and I pray so that our friendship and bond will remain strong and forever everlasting. Khoo, you have been a close brother to me. I enjoy working with you during the three promotional weeks. We complement each other very well and we succeeded by overhitting the targets for three consecutive times.

To Vivi and Jess, it is such a beautiful honour for me to know you two good-looking girls and yet kind as well. You let me see something special within yourself in which I could not normally see in an ordinary girl’s personality. To Reyno and Milo, thank you so much. Thank you, all of you so so much.. I enjoy every second, every minute, every hour and every day being with all of you.

I wish you all happy and peaceful always and also all the best. Merry Christmas to all of you too.

Merry, merry Christmas.. Lonely,lonely Christmas..

Reflection so far....The Transitory Period Towards The New Hellish Period of Time

2008-12-09T23:33:00.000+08:00

Walking in the dark

These few weeks are pretty peaceful for me. My mind is free from any burdens of studies and also from stress due to "unnecessary campus-social commitments" . I believe that I have almost recovered from the gruelling first semester in UTAR that made me jaded and emotionally affected.

Working part-time in the fragrance line is a lot more fun than what I expected earlier. I met people of different backgrounds, races, creeds and even genders (These include the transsexuals too). Besides, I learn many things and I use what I have inside me to earn a lot of money. Some from the rival counters began to feel envious about my supervisor for he has a valuable asset and a strong right-handed man in his side. The valuable asset that he has now is showered with numerous praises for the high work rate and dedication towards work commitment that the valuable asset showed.

Nevertheless, it is never good to be overcame by complacency. It is better to focus more on doing the best for anything that you are committed to. That is the principle I always strongly embrace though there are certain quarters who feel "doing just enough" is better than "doing the best".

I make many new friends and we are quite close to each other. We will always try to lunch or dine together whenever we have the opportunity to do so. Some good-looking, cute and pretty girls working there do join us during the break too. They do not mind to have meal with you one on one too. Looking at how open-minded and frank they are, I feel very lucky to know girls who are not belonged to those "jual mahal' types. Unlike one or two rather arrogant and jual mahal-loving girls I met in my life, they are very nice persons and nice friends as well. Their personalities are much better than those girls who themselves think they are pretty enough to "befriend you one day, and kick you out on another day". Anyway, as a peace-loving person, I wish them the best and may they lead a peaceful life.

Today is just the first of my three days off but I have started to miss the new friends although the real date we are going our own ways is still around one month away. I am clueless too about this but I really treasure and cherish the camaraderie we have together. The examination for the Pengajian Malaysia subject falls on this Friday 12th of December. Thus, I took 3 days off in order to prepare for this paper and I hope I will do well.

During these few weeks, I did make myself to think about the coming new long semester this January. I expect it will be much harsher than the previous long semester. It will be even more unforgiving and I believe I need to prepare and brace myself against the turbulent hellish period and non-stop emotion torturing troubles.

It is do-or-die in the new semester and I know there will be no turning back. If I really want to place myself inside the President’s List, the only way is to obtain very excellent result in the final examination. I will muster all my courage and go all out for this new semester. I have myself to be blamed for the unsatisfactory result during the last semester. I told myself there will be no more room for mediocrity. There shall be no room for procrastination too. I pray so that I will get excellent result for the next semester examination and I pledge I will do anything to improve my CGPA in order to ensure that I will be well-placed in the President's List by the time I graduate.

I can foresee that those who do not change themselves will be doomed even further. If they remain as they are, it will be difficult for them to pick themselves up. A great historian, George Santayana once said, “Those who do not heed history will be condemned to repeat it.” Yes and it is really true. If you do not learn from your mistakes, you will tend to repeat the same mistakes. As for myself, I realized that I made a grave mistake last semester and hopefully, I won’t be condemned to repeat it in the coming new one.

Sometimes, I felt that instead of helping them, I was actually killing off their future. Yes, I can help them but until when?? If they couldn’t work on their own, how can they assure themselves a successful life in the future? You might say helping out is a good virtue but not until he or she needs you to help him or her all the way until they do not have the chance to stand on their own and be independent. They will get used (probably, some of them have already gotten used to..) to being fed with help without ever trying to work themselves up. I can help you but you need to help yourselves too in order to ensure my help and your own effort will be worthwhile and will bear good results.

However, dilemma always commence when someone tried to accuse you as not a good friend for not being helpful. They think that if you help them all the way out and doing anything for them, only then you are considered a good friend. In reality however, you are not a good friend actually. You are doing a great disservice to them. The more you provide the unlimited help, the more they will suffer in the future. As I said, instead of helping them, you are actually killing off their future.

At times, I took a great pain too to think that if someone can obtain such excellent result, why not I? I do not mind to bludgeon myself with hard works from now on. Some people may think it is difficult to dethrone a genius. Yes, the odd heavily favors the genius whenever the genius is pitted against a hard worker. But who cares? No matter how the odd stacks heavily against me, I will not choose to give up. I can accept the fate but I will never give up. I am going to get myself into President's List no matter what the circumstances are.

Looking back into the last semester has enlightened me in many aspects. I can see how strong and fearless someone can be during the difficult and trying times. I can see how ugly a person is even though that person has a very good-looking appearance. I can see how a person who thinks himself can understand everyone very well is actually a person who understands nothing but a wrong thing. I can also see people tend to have groupthink that reduces their perspectives. Therefore, they are not able to see things clearly and also which is actually the right and which is actually the wrong. That is why this group of people always has misperception and will never try to see things beyond that. And lastly, I can see that loneliness is killing someone NO MORE.

What you need to do is search for your solace inside you. By the time you found your solace, you will no longer fear of being unable to survive while trapped between two different worlds. One which you love very much with some elements inside do not really like you, and another world which has no problem accepting you with some elements inside made you feel almost unwelcomed. How ironic, huh?

The transitory period towards the new hellish period of time has just begun. The past experience has given me new wings to face another endless tormenting and torturing hell. And it has also enabled me to SEE a lot of things from now on.

Tips for Pengajian Malaysia paper UPDATED

2008-11-29T00:47:00.000+08:00

People talk about social contributions made by large companies, groups and individuals. They talk about the social responsibility bore by them as what they have today come from the people themselves. So what did the people give them? I suppose it should be power. Power itself can be defined widely. For example, the power to change, the power to earn profit, the power to own luxury, the power to develop so on and so forth. As such, "with great power, comes great responsibility".

I do not have any power in my hand. Perhaps, no one wants to give me any. For the time being, I wouldn't want any power given to me too. Thus, allow me to exercise my responsibility to contribute to people, especially my fellow friends without having any power at all.

I believe that using blog to display the tips given by lecturer is a good idea. It helps to save time and reduce work duplicating. I will no longer need to entertain every single request for tips from friends who were absent in the class. They can just come and visit my blog for the tips.

Below are the tips for Pengajian Malaysia paper:

Soalan Objektif :
Basically, he asked to read the whole textbook. However, he managed to highlight some parts which will come out for sure:

1) Perlembagaan Malaysia pada tahun 1957 & 1963
2) Kewarganegaraan
3) Malayan Union
4) Pendudukan Jepun di Tanah Melayu
5) Pilihanraya
6) Eksekutif
7) Majlis Raja-raja
8) Judisiari (Perundangan)
9) Dasar Ekonomi, Dasar Sosial dan Dasar Luar Negara
10) Kemerdekaan
11) Masyarakat Majmuk
12) British
13) Rukun Negara
14) Pembentukan Malaysia pada 1963
15) Integrasi

Soalan Esei:
So far, he just gave one but he promised to give more during the last lecture. So once I got it, I will update this post. For now,satisfy yourself with what is being written down here.

1) Rukun Negara

Basically, if you have the slides for Rukun Negara, then you do not need to worry. Everything is just there, and you can photocopied the whole thing into your mind and pour it out during the exam.
He did give advice on how we should write the answer which is: Pengenalan dan Latar Belakang Kaum, Pembentukan (bila, oleh siapa, Langkah-langkah terlibat dalam pembentukan), Nyatakan kelima-lima RukunNegara and explain them one by one, Huraika Tujuan/Matlamat/Kepentingan, Kesimpulan

2) He also mentioned that Dasar Ekonomi Baru, Dasar Pembangunan Nasional and Dasar Wawasan Negara will be excluded in essay questions.

Hmm,it is advisable for you to use the tips with discretion. The best way is always to make full preparation so that you will not be pushing panic button during examination and blaming others for your failure to score later. Plus, it is also advisable not to ask me whether this will be included in this topic or whether this will be excluded. The best is you turn up for the last lecture to get yourself feeling secured with the remaining tips given.

I just give the tips based on what I was able to hear from the lecturer and also based on what I was able to copy. So whoever turned up for today's lecture and saw some differences between the tips they written themselves and mine, do not hesitate to let me know.

Alright, that's all for now.. Remember to say thanks,hehe...

UPDATED!

Soalan Esei:

Soalan 2: Dasar Pendidikan Kebangsaan

Textbook pg.227
Bila/Oleh siapa
Matlamat/Objektif
Strategi Pelaksanaan
Tujuan

Soalan 3: Demokrasi Berparlimen

Soalan 4: Perpaduan Kaum di Malaysia

Masalah/ cabaran
Cara memupuk perpaduan kaum: Dasar pendidikan kebangsaan, Dasar kebudayaan, asimilasi, amalgamasi (pembinaan negara bangsa)
Slide Lec 20: Integrasi 2

Kiasu and Kiasi: The Truth Revealed! Especially for A Man Called Justin

2008-11-15T20:30:00.000+08:00

Suren:" I love being gay everyday"

Yesterday night, I saw a very 'nice and interesting' sentence on someone's personal message on the MSN. Why was it nice and interesting? This was because my name appeared on it twice unlike other friends who had their names appeared only once. To make things much more spicy attractive, let us take a look on what was written.. Oh, do not forget to understand the meaning,ok?

"me=Q1&2...kaiyik 3,4..kitson..5&6,yingli.7&8..yeewei 9...then combine...lol..(p.s...KITSON,dun kiasu eh..)"

Yes, this is exactly the same thing written on his personal message without having a single mistake in punctuation and spelling.

Yes and yes, he was telling everyone in his MSN contacts in a very crystal clear way (though a little bit indirect) that I am a "kiasu" person (which means "afraid to lose" in Hokkien dialect). Hence, I expect many old TARC friends of mine, my UTAR coursemates and his own friends will take notice of it. Whether they believe it or not, it's not up to me to decide.

Incidents of me being called "kiasu" are not something new. It actually started even when I was in TARC. These unwelcomed callings are just recently and heavily amplified by certain parties when I am in UTAR. Well, I do not fear being mocked around although it was sad to know that they spent their precious time to mock me rather than doing beneficial things for their ownselves. After all, I have grown immune to those callings.

But the manner of this mockery that this fella done through MSN was something actually uncalled for. And he went overboard too. Since he has the audacity to put me under the spotlight, I suppose I should return the favour to him too. Only then it will be a fair game.

Frankly speaking, he did not get his facts right beginning from the first day he called me "kiasu". He picked the wrong guy to call a "kiasu" too. So whoever read this, please bear witness of what is being written here.

I would like to state that I am not a kiasu. I am not afraid of losing in my life. If there are any competitions came across my life as a student or as a growing adult, I will treat them as healthy competitions. In competitions, surely there will be one side being the winner and another side being the loser. I accept this fact with utmost respect and whenever I suffer loss or defeat, I will accept it graciously and vow to work hard to win another round.

I am not afraid to lose but I do hate losing. I do not like to lose and I like to win. Never get yourself confused with these two statements. Afraid to lose and Hate to lose are two different things and in no way, both can be defined as same. A "kiasu" is usually a sore loser in which I don't. As I said just now, if I suffer defeat or to be more precise, if I do not get the result I desired, I will accept it graciously and honorably. So, there is a difference between me and a "kiasu".

Besides, I never use any unethical and wrong methods that are against my conscience to achieve what I have in my life. A "kiasu" on the other hand,will tend to use whatsover methods be it good or evil, just to achieve what he or she wants. In addition, a "kiasu" likes to be in a state of denial, avoiding facing the truth and do not like to accept facts. I,myself will always accept the thing that had happened. I dare to face the problems and truth and will always agree to RECONCILIATION OF TRUTH.

Based on these, I can strongly affirm that I am no "kiasu". Sometimes, I do ponder what are the rationales Malaysians called Singaporeans "kiasu" and "kiasi"? Even if these Singaporeans are "kiasu", they are still much more way forward than us. Singapore are much more progressive than Malaysia. So, is not that something good that though there are 'kiasu and kiasi', they achieve much more remarkable success than us?

Many in Malaysia tend to be anti-kiasu and anti-kiasi. They do not really love those who they perceived as kiasu and kiasi and some will cast them out for not being in the same mindsets with them. Their mindsets are totally different from those kiasus in which they are "su ka su" (like to lose in Hokkien) and "su ka si" (like to die in Hokkien).

These people do not mind being lose out to others. They do not cherish success and most of the time are not ambitious. They will just enjoy and be easily satisfied with whatever they have and they are static. They tend not to improve themselves and they prefer a safer and a less risky route in their life. If you ask them what are their target in their examination, they will not tell you they want either A, A- or B. They will tell you gleefully, "I am happy to get just a pass" or "Pass is enough lor"

Besides, they like to do things in a 'cincai' manner. To them, "copy and paste" or "plagiarising" in important subjects are fine. Some will not hesitate to do things in last minutes and turn up with works in which its quality can be very much disputed. Simply said, they love mediocrity. That is why they are "su ka su" and "su ka si". Logically said, "kiasu" and "kiasi" actually make someone a better person compared to "su ka su" and "su ka si". "Kiasu" and "kiasi" at least fight for what they want and they want something better for their life whereas in terms of "su ka su" and "su ka si" , they don't. I am not supporting a motion to fight for "kiasu" and "kiasi". I am merely stating the truth and I am speaking my mind out.

So, since they dislike or maybe do not really like someone who they called a "kiasu", why did they ask for help from a "kiasu" whenever they need one? Plus, since they do not really like or disagree with the ways used by a "kiasu", why did they enlist the help of a "kiasu"? Doesn't it sound slightly hypocritical of them to do like that?? Being nice to you at the moment they need your help and they turn their face another way round when they don't?? What a "luxury" they enjoy from someone whom they called a "kiasu"!!

Hmm, in another viewpoint, since they have a bad impression on "kiasu and kiasi", didn't they notice that sometimes they are actually "kiasu and kiasi" as well? Whenever they land themselves in deep troubles which cause them to have shits on their hands and which also strike fear to them, they tend to use methods, be it the positive or the negative (in fact, it is negative most of the time) to solve their problems. As long they can clean the shits and messes off their hands, any methods are fine. Isn't that an act belonged to those who they called a "kiasu"? They are afraid to have these huge problems and therefore they want to get rid of it ASAFP (quoting the shorthand used by Robert Downey Jr. in the movie Tropic Thunder).

Apart from that, to the man who called himself Justin; isn't the scheme you devised for this morning's test a reflection of your "kiasuness" and your "kiasiness"? You planned to have one person reading few chapters and another reading another chapters so on and so forth. Through his unsuccessful scheme, if anyone have difficulties in a question, he or she can ask those who are more 'expert' on the related chapters.

However it was fated that your scheme failed after all. Your scheme to avoid failure that emphasised on cooperation did not work at all. This is what I have expected earlier as some did not read or understand the chapters assigned to them. At the end, many chose to open book secretly while answering the test paper. That was why I opted to read all and study as much I can. As such, I could help those who asked me even though it wasn't about the chapters assigned to me. I did not rely completely on your 'kiasu scheme'.

Plus,how about many others that open book to answer the test paper? Did you consider them "kiasu" too for being afraid of failure and for resorting to open book to answer the questions correctly? For my own part, I admitted that I opened book too after answering 85% of the questions without relying on open book, but that should not come into question as you had already considered me earlier as a "kiasu"..

Overall, it is advisable not to call someone "kiasu" or "kiasi". This is because you could have already became one when you called it. Even if you do not belong to those "kiasu and kiasi", you could have belonged to those "su ka su" or "su ka si".Look at yourself, look around you and make sure you are qualified enough before you called someone a kiasu. Picking the wrong guy to call kiasu is an insult of your own intelligence.

Plus, between you and me (your so-called kiasu), Mr. Justin..who always have the last laugh? Surely it is not you.

Oh, Mr. Justin, the words on the picture are specially for you so that you can think carefully before you say something.. OR ELSE

Can't see it properly, the man who called Justin? Just SHUT UP, FUCK OFF!!

p.s: oops, the caption on your picture above doesn't mean you are a homosexual, Suren.. The sentence's grammar is the best indicator that I am not addressing you as a homosexual. If you do not know what does the "gay" on the caption refers to, feel free to log onto http://www.merriam-webster.com/

R.I.P

2008-11-10T09:53:00.003+08:00

This few days are rather sombre.. I received the news of the passing of my friend's father and the grandma of another friend last Saturday and last week respectively.

I felt really sorry to hear that and here, I would like to offer my sincere condolence to Kenny and his family and also to Hoay Shuang and her family. My thought will always be with you and hope you will be strong..

Uncle Low, may your soul rest in peace.. and Mrs.Fau, may your soul rest in peace too

The First Self-Confessed Fan of The Chronicles of Starlight

2008-11-10T09:10:00.006+08:00

Do you love this rather wicked smile?

This is the first post for this month, and thus the DarkSide is back.. I have been working for the past few days, therefore I couldn't find the time to post. There is an assignment to be done as well. So, you can think if now I couldn't find any free time in this relaxing and slacking three months of pseudo break, what will happen during the long semester? Probably, the blog will be updated once a month or maybe none..LOL.. Anyway anyhow,I will always try my best to update this blog.

A week ago, I received a surprise news which turned out to be a surprise revelation. The Chronicles of Starlight scored its first! There was one person who came to me in MSN, admitted and confessed to me that she is a fan of my blog. Hahaha!! She told me that what I wrote is very 'real' and as if she, herself was inside the situations described inside some of the posting. She said my postings are very detailed and well-written. LOL.. and I thought no one would love to read wordy, long-winded and detailed stuffs! For that particular time, I did imagine that if I plan not to be in the life science field, I can opt to screenplay writing. I could write a good script which is capable of winning awards in film festivals or even Oscar! Haha...well it was just an imagination anyway.. I do not think I will give a serious thought to it for now

Surely, some may think I am silly to be just happy simply because my blog has a fan. They claimed their blogs have a lot of readers too.

Well, who cares? I have no idea on how many people visited my blog and I have no idea on how many people read my posting. You may have a lot of readers but how many people have ever told you that he or she is a self-confessed fan of your blog? A self-confessed fan means he or she is truly a sincere fan and love what you posted on your blog. He or she doesn't necessarily agree with what you had written. But at least, he or she can find some truth and different perspective of situations inside your writings. So, how many you have?

Nevertheless, thank you so much, Sam.. I am motivated to write even more, without prejudice and fear. I will always update my blog with interesting insights and views.

Le jeu dangereux de lingerie enlèvement

2008-10-25T14:40:00.000+08:00

I went home with some kind of feeling deep down inside yesterday after some mini-function. I could not tell what was it but I was sure it didn't feel nice. It could be the mixture of anger, excitement, outrage and some elements of resilient and resentment. I was pondering what some of my friends said earlier when he related to the experience he had with many friends in a some sort like "true or dare" game. According to them, it was very fun! Most of the boys were pretty excited and had that 'feel'. Allow me to said that 'feel' belonged to those filthy brutes.

The loser during that game was subjected to compromise her own dignity, self-respect, honour and self-worth. When I heard that, I felt a little bit disgusted albeit with some excitement due to the normal nature of a young man. However, my conscience is crystal clear that I strongly disagree and reject such act that dishonour a fellow friend.

The boys rejoiced and said the loser was very 'sporting'. Hmm,why don't you think what if that friend was your closed one that was subjected to that act? What if that person was from your families? You are a future parent and how would you feel if you know that the person is your children?

Did you ever think of the consequences that what if the game went awry and bred out one or a group of beasts? The loser might be 'sporting' enough and didn't complain anything but please think carefully whether it was a respectable or a morally right thing to do. Probably, you all felt it was nothing much and the loser didn't lose everything at all because it was a hideous act. Looking at those "Gossip Girls", "One Tree Hill", so on and so forth, you may think that "come on la, do not hide under a shell..come out and see the real world".

Call me narrow-minded, sohai, unsporting or whatsoever. Call me a faked gentleman, a pretender or whatsoever.. My conscience is clear. I will not condone such act. I vow and pledge to refrain myself from committing such act or any acts related to dishonour someone and remove someone's dignity. I vow and pledge to defend my friends and closed ones from being subjected to such disgusting act!

Anyway, what they told me yesterday was more or less a blessing in disguise to me. It justified my past decision to give up something which I knew it would be an unsuccessful and futile pursuit. And I learnt the risks and dangers of Le jeu dangereux de lingerie enlèvement

You either die as a HERO or you live long enough to see yourself become a VILLAIN...

2008-10-20T21:05:00.006+08:00

"YOU EITHER DIE AS A HERO OR YOU LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO SEE YOURSELF BECOME A VILLAIN...."

This is one of my favourite lines in my one of my favourite movies, The Dark Knight. At first I do not really understand this statement from Harvey Dent a.k.a The Two Face played by Aaron Eckhart. Only when this statement is repeated by Batman at the end of the movie, I understand what Harvey Dent meant. And this statement, I felt it really represents some episodes and remarkable chapters of my life.

You may ask how this statement relates to my life? How do I associate myself to both hero and villain? To answer this question, it really requires a great deal of courage and articulation from me. It is not always easy to give answers in which other people may perceive them as critical, one-sided, unjust or maybe me in the state of denial!

Anyway, anyhow I had mentioned in my older post "What a pity..What a loss..What a waste" that I will talk about my "so-called attitude problem" claimed by certain people. And in this post, I would like to provide an alternative answer from an alternative perspective so that people can have the opportunity to know things from both sides, and not just one side. Through this, I believe I can salvage some justice for myself. Whether I am correct or I am not, it is all solely depending on you.

I am not sure whether I am a hero to the people around me although I am sure that I did play few roles of a hero for example helping other people . I helped my friends sincerely in their studies and assignments. In group lab reports or assignments, I helped correcting the problems, the mistakes and the errors made by my fellow group members before submitting. Besides, when no one has any idea or maybe lacked of idea for the assignment, I helped to contribute some ideas so that my group can keep the momentum going. I also helped the other members by advising them and also to drive them so that they can bring themselves into a higher level and will do their best.

Unfortunately, I believe most people will laugh all that off and may deny some of them. It is ok because I never expect any rewards or gifts after I helped them. A thank is sufficient although sometimes I do not get any after I helped. But it is alright. Like Batman said in the Batman Begins, after Lieutenant Jim Gordon told him that he hasn't thanked him, "You don't have to.."

So far, I still have not died yet and am still living. But one thing for sure, certain people do assume me as THE VILLAIN.Probably it is because I chided or I gently told off some of them due to their lack of effort and quality in their assigned part during an assignment. Probably, it is because I disagreed with some of them that love hedonism until they neglected their important matters in studies and life. Probably, it is also because I speak the language which is different with some of them until they said "You and we are not having the same channel!". Or maybe probably because I look very ugly.. HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Very well then.. I always agree that no one is perfect and everyone sure will make mistakes. Robert Kiyosaki, the acclaimed author of "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" once said during an interview: "My biggest mistake in my life is not making enough mistakes" . To him, for every mistake we made, we will be able to learn so that we will not repeat the same mistake. I myself have made a lot of mistakes including the blatant and stupid ones. And I will always say sorry from the bottom from my heart regardless of whether I am correct or wrong during a crisis in order to save the friendship. Very few forgave me for that although I had forgiven many people that did many mistakes to me. Seemingly, an apology is never enough.

I admit that sometimes, I pushed my group members too hard until they claimed I am very stubborn and too serious and also am a dictator that controlled everything. Besides, I admit that sometimes I do not play by the rules set by them and I break it until they hate me. I admit that I am very firm with my belief and decision in which sometimes people perceived me as I am a self-proclaimed perfect person that can tell what is right and what is wrong. I admit too that I sometimes vent out my frustation and anger at them if they made very big mistakes until they perceive that I am inconsiderate and have a serious ATTITUDE PROBLEM!!!

Eh hem, well try to think again, guys. If I try to push you so that you can improve yourself and give a high-quality product from you, do you think it is unethical and wrong to do so? If what you done is clearly wrong and has many errors or maybe left out many crucial areas, should not it be right for me to advise you to correct it or add on the part that you left out? Furthermore,is it totally wrong that I chided you if you made a serious mistake that could spell big trouble to everybody?

Yes, you may now start to think that I am in the state of denial. That I am denying any responsibilities of things that I have done. As I said earlier, in many situation, I am more than willing to apologize regardless of whether I am right or wrong. Undeniably, my apology sometimes doesn't always come early. Sometimes, it is only after thorough reflection, soul searching and meticulous consideration of the whole situation that cares for everyone's benefit, that I offer my sincere apology.

Oh now, you may think how could my apology be a sincere one when my apology comes late and looks as if I am forced to do so? Well, soul searching and reflection are for myself to analyse whether I had actually done wrong. Meticulous consideration of the whole situation is for myself to see whether an apology from me will end the long-winded crisis that occur. A long crisis will never be beneficial to both parties. If they are still very very very firm, that I am the one is wrong,so why not I come out with the initiative to say sorry? At a crucial time that needs everyone's cooperation, I can't afford to be selfish to care much about my reputation or to save face or whatsoever. My main focus for that is to end the crisis once and for all.

Acceptance of my apology is another matter. Whether they will accept or not does not lie on my hand. After all, I do not know how many holes at my back due to ferocious and nonstop backstabbing. I also have no idea on how many times people called me "sohai" and told me "go to hell" when they discussed not in front of me or while I was away.

Sometimes, it is just sad to see such things happened. I tried to help them only to find out that I was misinterpreted and misunderstood as doing the bad things towards them. Not to mention that some of those helps went unappreciated too. Apart from that, I realised what the Joker said to Batman in the Dark Knight is true under some circumstances.

He said , "THEY NEED YOU NOW.. BUT WHEN THEY DON'T, THEY'LL CAST YOU OUT".

Why so serious?

When my help is needed most, I received many calls and SMSes and also endless MSN nudges. They even come to you with a smile and gleeful face. That time, I never said no when they request my help. After that, some of them do not bother or do not even give a damn to say hi or to talk to you. In a very bad way to say, at times I did feel that I'm needed when I'm useful. Once I have finished helping them and become no longer useful, I'm just a dust to their eyesight.

Last time my group obtained an A- for an assignment. That particular assignment was so difficult and I and another friend had to cover many of three other members' mistakes. The work was delayed several times due to the lack of effort and cooperation from the three members. Two of the three did not even turn up for several meetings too. The presentation of role played by members was important in the assignment as it was part of the assignment's requirement. Another one member was still ok as he did contribute in certain areas albeit with mistakes. But as a sign of courtesy, both I and another friend decided to create and make up the roles played by the Invisible Two.. Only when we got an A-, The Invisible Two became visible and rejoiced with us. The Invisible Two and that one member celebrated as if they were the HEROES of the day without realising who was actually the TRUE HERO.

Anyway, I never bear any grudges against those who ill-treated me or those who think that I am the biggest villain. I do not hate them for I know that they are always my friends no matter how. If they need me for help, I will try my best to be there for them. I am not writing this to show that this is as if the end of the world for me. I always know that this world has place for everyone. In conclusion, You either die as a HERO or you live long enough to see yourself become a VILLAIN...

The silent guardian, the watchful protector and ..THE DARK KNIGHT

Group Lab Report VS Individual Lab Report

2008-10-18T01:27:00.001+08:00

One Against Many

The new semester commences and once again, I face another unknown hurdles in front of me. I said unknown because I really have no idea whether these hurdles belonged to difficult type or easy type. Getting good result is not what I am worrying about. It is actually the process towards getting it.

Based on what I endured in the last semester, the disadvantages of doing group reports become even more evident compared to the time when I was in TARC. In this semester, the students are required to complete a group assignment for Pengajian Malaysia. Fortunately, a group assignment is much better than a group report due to the longer time given by the lecturer to complete it. As such, students can buy some time to solve any problems that cropped up. Unlike an assignment,the due date for a lab report is either next week or maximum two weeks. So,the fate of your report lies on that shorter period of time.

I have managed to interview myself few coursemates and friends regarding this matter. Surprisingly, the responses were not what I have expected. I thought they would have favoured doing group report rather than individual report. Instead, some of them love doing individual reports as much as I do. Then, I realised I had made a mistake in my mini-survey. The group of people that I interviewed is not random enough. Thus, the voices that said yes to individual report could be actually representing the minority group. OMG..

In fact, I do know majority of students that study with me love group report so much that they crave for it everytime a lecturer asks us to do a lab report during practical hour. Being individual lab report lover does not mean that I am totally against group report. However, I just feel sad whenever there are attempts to misuse and abuse or to take advantage of group report to become an 'idle group member'.

Group report is not bad if everyone inside a group contributes PROACTIVELY, NOT REACTIVELY regardless of your level of understanding towards a subject and your level of intelligence. PROACTIVE means that you are alert, have initiative to execute a task, able to stand on his own and are actively involved in a task given. REACTIVE on the other hands refers to someone who is rather passive and only do something whenever being asked. It also refers to someone who is reliant on others . Bear in mind that I do not liken REACTIVE to being stupid or weak because REACTIVE people can be very very smart.

However, inside the world of realism, you can never expect that things will go your way but you can expect that things can always not go your way. Lets explore few questions below and their answers based on my perspective.

Can group report really save time? Most of the time is no based on my experience. In many occasions, I find an easy task which can be solved within three days require slightly longer than a week..Time efficient? Absolutely not..Ya,communication nowadays is easier with MSN and SMS but so what? But it also create opportunities for work duplicating. What a waste of time if the same work is done twice or thrice by few persons at the same time. Furthermore, you need to communicate to other members about your work progress and also need to involve in discussions which can turn out to be nonproductive at all most of the time. Worst still, if there is a situation when you need to wait for your friend to complete his or her part before you can proceed your own.

Can we ensure that the quality of the report produced by a group will be better than an individual? There is no absolute certainty that group report will be better. Whenever I do individual report, I find it easier to monitor my own work quality. Should there be any mistakes, I can correct them straight away. In contrast, it is always difficult to do that. I have to meet my friends to discuss again and again to find the right solution if the parts they completed and mine did not complement each other with many contradicting statements, informations etc. Another time wasting.

Yes, I agree that being inside a group will encourage exchange and sharing of ideas, informations and knowledges. But what if you are inside a group where there is only one or two persons proactive enough to understand the instructions and guidelines from the lecturers and also how the experiment is being done? If the other members stay reactive and do not take initiative to understand at all, this results in the proactive members to spend time to explain the whole process to them again. As a result, another time wasting.

Yes yes, it's the responsibility of each member in a group to help each other if one encounter difficulties. That's always the teamwork spirit where many have high regards of. If there is one member asking you on how to do this and how to do that, sure you have the obligation to help him or her. Although sometimes you felt "come on, can you please not disturb me again?", still you must help him or her no matter how. Why?? Because he or she is your teammate and you need to exercise the teamwork spirit. But but what if the situation below occurs?

A: Yes, I've completed mine! now you go with yours. after you completed your part, just

combine with mine and submit.

B:Hey, I got a problem with mine. Can you do me a favor by helping me to find even more

info?

A: Aiya, I've done mine already, so please don't disturb me. you just try your best la...

The situation above did occur based on my experience either directly or indirectly. The real one could happen indirectly. The situation above looks rather direct as I think it is difficult to transpire it indirectly in my blog. After all, it looks much more clearer and understandable. Therefore, you call this a teamwork spirit? I call it a bullshit.

Yes yes yes, a good student can help a not-so- good student. A good student can help a not-so- good student to achieve higher marks. This will eventually enable both students to score very well in their laboratory paper. Sadly, this is not what I see. Some not-so-good students tend to be lazy and rely mostly on the good student to do everything. As the former contributes less, this will drag down the good students too. The good students in turn will achieve lower marks and do not get the marks they are well-deserved. Some of this not-so- good students feel it is ok to score lower marks. They think they have nothing to lose and a pass is more than sufficient. Come on! Do you think it is fair for the good students? They want to get A or B. But you make them to follow you to score a meagre C!

Yes yes yes yes. Group reports promote synergy where the work produced by group members is better than an individual. Unfortunately, how can synergy occur if 'cincai and just need to pass' mentality is inside some of the members' mindset? "Hey, this is the last report, cincai do only la.." "Hey,do not be stubborn la..other people also like that,why need to do nice nice?" "Wei,no need to be so serious la..copy and paste then ok lo". If anyone work with me and appoint me either as true group leader or de facto group leader: say such things to me, I'll tell them "sorry,that's not my culture. If you want to get a mere pass,go ahead.But please do not stop me from getting an A".

Once, I had a group doing a lab report comprising of eight members! Oh my,for just one report, do you think you need to have so many people? How are you going to divide the jobs equally in terms of the amount of works and the difficulties?! Initially,it was only four members including me. We have arranged that one person (which was me) would do the objectives and result, two would share the workloads of doing 12 graphs and another one doing discussion,conclusion and reference (Discussion, conclusion and references are normally interrelated to each other. so it is logical for the people who do discussion, will do the conclusion and references as well). Then suddenly, another two friends told me, "hey we do together la the report..not just four person only". I then informed the other three members to let them join in by virtue that two of them worked with us together in the same experiment. Ok,fine.. Then I asked them whether it is ok, two of you to help the one person doing discussion, conclusion and reference. They said no problem.

Throughout the completion of the report,I needed to take the hassle of correcting my friends' graphs due to some many important stuffs they left out. I needed to help out the three person doing the discussion after I finished my part. I contributed the ideas on how to do and even took the initiative to meet the Teaching Assistant several times on how to do the discussion. After I got the input from the TA, I shared with them.

The day before the report was to be submitted, they dropped the bombshell. Of all sudden,one of the two friends that had just joined in told me that another two girls joined in. What the heck!! I asked them how about the discussion. They said the two girls had done it. Then, what about you guyz that do the discussion? You guyz just stayed idle and did nothing at all? They said they did and managed to find some information. He sent them to me and ask me to combine with the two girls' part. OMG..what's the difference of me helping you to do all? I said "fine, I'll do it". But when I gone through, all the information sent to me did not even meet the requirement and input said by the TA. Some of the information is not necessary and is not useful at all. And the girl's discussion left out so many important parts. It was like they expected me to help them to clean up their mess in few minutes in that late night. While correcting and rectifying the errors, I got scolded by my parents for not allowing my brother to sleep. I had to ask them to give me some time for this report needed to be submitted on the next day. It was such a horrendous night with so many parts left out including the conclusion and reference and I had to brave myself through my parents' scolding to rectify the errors.

Printing and submitting were also another problem that led to me arguing with another fella. It was quite difficult to submit that report as there were no class on that day. So, most will always prefer to stay home to relax and relinquish themselves from the responsibility submit.But since I live so far from the campus and he lives near the campus (he lives in Wangsa Maju) , do you think it is rationale for me to be the one who do the printing and submitting? Well, as I said earlier in the teamwork issue, once they have completed their own task, they will not bother to help out the rest. If I stay in Taman Bunga Raya or Taman Melati or Wangsa Maju, I could have offered myself to do that, but apparently I am not!

Overall, doing group report has left me a bad taste in numerous occasion. Anyway, I know doing group report is something inevitable in my course. I hope things can improve too in the next long semester. In the future, I know I will be working in the environment where project team is emphasised. For that, I do know that I am a team player although I am a task oriented person. I will contribute as much as I can so that a task can be executed with success. As for now in the campus life,call me Lone Ranger if you want and I will not give a damn. In a group assignment or a group report, I will participate proactively as I always do.

A Tale of Bad Policy, Red Tape and Low-class Management (part 2)

2008-10-16T20:00:00.003+08:00

THE DARK SIDE OF UTAR

Hmm..if someone told me what I wrote in part 1 was harsh, I won't deny it either. So far, I never heard of any complaints from Biotechnology and Chemistry seniors that had or had not graduated (who also took two years diploma in TARC like me)regarding the industrial training issue. Even if there were complaints, I wouldn't know too as I'm still new in UTAR.

One thing for sure, the case of UTAR having bad management is rather widely heard among UTAR students and its community.. I once received a poem from my friend,and although it focused more on PJ campus,many similarities are found in Setapak Campus. Thus, I'm not hesitated too to publish it in my blog.

A POEM from UTAR FCI:

I join Utar because its 'pien yi',
I also thought it will be a good uni,
but end i jalan jauh sampai nak mati,
because all the faculties telah dibahagi....

in UTAR everything is about money,
pay late then they phone tak henti henti
even worse the officers talk like your are seekor babi,
no manners no courtesy...

Admin is crazy,
you wanna find DSA they will ask you to go jalan from PA to PD
if you complain they will say dont be lazy,
remind again kena marah lagi...

If got class til malam nanti,
after 8 the air cond will mati,
when we complain heaty,
they say the building is empty,
meng meng still got security,
where got count as empty...

UTAR thought we are monkey,
payment also need to go different faculties,
from collecting receipt, filling in form to paying money,
From PC, PA, PC and need certified go PD ...

If your lazy please dont come to this uni,
coz UTAr bus service also need money,
they dont accept cash accept tickets what a pity,
70 cents if u want to beli....

people say come uni,
sure can tiao yu,
mana tau whole uni oso 'beh khi',
got leng lui also treat us like sui yu...

toilet in UTAR very geli,
if it dont stink then your very lucky,
but the floors are very watery,
if you complain to the aunty,
they also tak peduli,
because they will be very penat if they really wanna cuci,
coz UTAR boyz dunno how to aim 'n' pee,
so it is very smelly...

driving in UTAR is a liability,
Every time you park its very risky,
no parking lot for student in the uni,
jaya one got but its not free,
if double park then put call me message but berhati-hati,
or else saman Rm300 lagi ...

food in every faculties also 'bu pien yi',
they will call out numbers with mic like pertandingan menyanyi,
want cheaper and niser food must go mamak kat tepi,
1 thing bad its hot and dirty ...

UTAR got alot of library,
small with insufficient facility,
going in also need to show ID,
people go in to walk and talk kat sana sini,
so students there are very noisy,
if your smart you know dont come in to study...

UTAR computer lab very mini,
Pen drive masuk lubang sure got baby,
pregnant with all the trojan, worm and cookies,
besides that the server very laggy,
in PA the lab is like CC,
student LAN games with any games terkini ...

UTAR staff dunno get how much for their salary,
if they have problem they will ask you tunggu sini,
change people also cannot solve it then they ask tunggu lagi,
then change people again also cant solve then very soli...

Chinese in UTAR is majority,
Dont know how to speak chinese then they will say you 'lan si',
good students always carry a electronic dictionary
so they will learn better for their study...

Dr Ling say UTAR is good so study disini,
but what is happening we also dont have berita terkini,
coz the moving to kampar is very lousy,
thats why all the good lecturers also wanna lari,
no one wanna go there as its a town like 3rd world country,
no KFC no MCD,
1 thing they have is MYFC,
trust me for that place is not counted as lousy...

assignment for GD banyak sampai mati,
rushing assignment setiap hari,
no need sleep macam zombie,
some more class will be 8 pagi,
so macam mana bangun ni,
end up kena barred lagi...

Utar is not very lousy,
if you like to 'tham siu pin yi'
after you come in you will terpendam dalam hati,
coz UTAR my choice is the tagline of this uni...

Before come in kena sedar diri,
Got money please go oversea,
study abroad not like me,
if got choice cabut lari,
or end up like me always memaki.....

There is actually another poem:

join Utar because UM reject me,
I thought Utar would be a good uni,
but end up wanna lompat from KLCC...

Utar exist thanks to MCA,
Dr Ling always said Utar bagus;
as he employed all MCA members,
so you can see cina, cina and cina...

Admin people not helpful,
always ask us to tunggu, tunggu, tunggu;
do things slow like siput,
remind again kena marah like gila...

Big white shark always tipu us,
said we could form any clubs;
when we want snooker club,
she said snookers only for smookers...

Utar treat us like donkey,
each seminar put us different places;
from block PA move to block PD,
distance PA to PD is 2km ...

FICT is getting crazy,
keep changing subjects for different intakes;
make us cannot get notes from seniors,
pity us have to study the whole text book...

Utar is University Tak Ada Ruang,
everything in Utar is limited;
based on first-come-first-serve basis,
if you are slow then is too bad ...

Classrooms in Utar are 'cheap sikit',
aircon not cold, we pening kepala,
tables, chairs, white boards all too small,
I wonder who could take the toll...

I drive CLK to Utar everyday,
kesian my Cute Little Kelisa got no place to park,
so I always block people's car,
leave message to remove car,
but end up polis give me summons...

PA canteen uncle very gemuk one,
I think he wear 65 inches pants,
always scold his worker malas tak kerja,
and the food always sejuk tak sedap ...

Library in Utar really kecil,
no books, no seats, no tables;
students there are very noisy,
sometimes I feel like bunuh them...

Utar computer lab tiada standard,
lab assistant always naik angin,
because we always ask him to change ribbon,
and Utar server always go mati ...

Utar got no place for revision,
every corner I go always see people,
break time I always get crazy,
because there is no place to study...

95 percent Utar student are Chinese,
only talk Mandarin, Hokkien and Hakka,
cannot speak a word in English,
so they always carry a electronic dictionary...

No doubts Utar got leng lui,
very pretty, very cute, and sexy,
make sure you got money before asking them out,
if not later she lari...

Utar always claim itself ada standard,
but you will vomit when u know the truth,
paying RM4,000-plus every semester,
but youʼll never get the value of 4k ...

Maybe you don't believe that Utar is so lousy,
you may ask your friends from Utar,
to see whether I'm telling the truth,
I'm here to let u know how bad it is ...

So please study hard in STPM,
so that you can go local U,
if not you'll be like me,
paying so much but still empty!

Anyway,anyhow I do not agree with some part on second poem. When it mentions about studying hard in STPM so that you can get a place in local U, I do not agree with this. As an experienced person, I know alot regarding this local U. No matter how good u study, non-bumiputras will stil find it difficult to enrol into the course they want. E.g: i have a friend who was interested in dentistry or other bioscience subjects got quite a good result for her STPM. She got 3.5 above which I believe was enough to secure her a place in the courses she wanted in local U. However, she got a course called Pemodalan Matematik..(WTF!) What can she do with this degree in the future?

UTAR has the potential to move into higher level and can be a top class University. As I said before, the quality of education is not bad and the recent appointment of new UTAR president has laid a foundation of turning UTAR into a research university (this was according to my OHR tutor). I find this as an interesting development considering that once Utar turned into a full-fledged research university, the students will benefit the most. They will have chance to be the first to know or to exposed to the latest successful researches done in UTAR. They have the opportunity as well to participate in the researches.

The only thing that disappointed me is the UTAR management. Red tape is there ,requiring completion of many forms and procedures. I have lost count of the number of forms I have submitted to the office for my registration, verification as a student and also for my scholarship. the whole processes were really slow, tedious and tiring.

Besides, there were some rude staff inside the office in Setapak Campus. My friends have some problems regrading the PTPTN loan find herself being scolded rudely as they were not sure on some procedures in PTPTN loan application. DAMN! I thought you are supposed to aid them in getting loan and to reduce their financial burden!

Therefore, if UTAR really wants to improve and become a top class university, UTAR must first improves its management and ensures no discrimination is bring practised and red tapes can be reduced.

A Tale of Bad Policy, Red Tape and Low-class Management (part 1)

2008-10-14T14:35:00.000+08:00

Hmm, after enduring one week plus of life without my pc, I can finally sigh a relief.. I can continue my quest on finding a temporary job, I can update myself with the latest development of our country's politicking, I can log onto my MSN, Facebook and Friendster. And not to forget, posting my thought on The Chronicles of Starlight!

That one week I must say made life a lot difficult to me.. What's more with the news I got from my group leader, Suren regarding the flip-flop changes and decisions made by the UTAR management in the Setapak Campus. In fact, it has been widely known to many people and students that the UTAR management in general is sucks, rude, inefficient and ineffective!

I wrote this without prejudice and fear for I believe that something must be done in order to improve UTAR. So far,in my three months life in UTAR, I can see UTAR's teaching quality itself in actual is good although there are few bad apples among the lecturers. One particluar lecturer in my course seems to be practising discrimination and unfairness in their treatment and attitude towards certain group of students. Nevertheless, majority of the lecturers are good and provide excellent quality teaching and lecturing.

Letz go back to the truth here. In my course,I have the opportunity to see myself the dreadful stuffs coming from UTAR management. It has two different policies in terms of students placement in industrial training. One is catered for students who have been studying in UTAR since foundation or first year degree. Another is for students who have exemptions for their first year degree and are allowed to join the second year degree batch of students directly.
For example, students from TARC who completed their two years diploma course, are allowed to come in as second year degree students.

The first group of students is allowed to go for industrial training after the first semester of the second year degree. The second one however, is not allowed due to the fact that we have not taken the Pengajian Malaysia subject unlike the students from the first group.

So what is the rationale of this? It seems to me that double standard is being practised and offers two different treatments to the students in biotechnology course..Unless there is no logic explaination, this will be deemed as ridiculous and unfair policy..

Being one of those who were robbed off their chance to go for their industrial training is something very difficult for me to accept. Industrial training is very important as it gives you an exposure to the current application of life sciences in the industries. It gives you the firsthand experience where you stand a chance to use many equipments which are far more sophisticated than the one we see in the university. Furthermore, it gives you a clear insight on your future career progression and direction. As for me, being able to join industrial training should not be an opportunity to be missed. But I did not miss it. The UTAR management made me missed it.

When I asked Dr. Hii, the officer in charge of the student placement in industrial training, she said she had no idea and could not give me any indication whether students came from TARC have chance to do it later. She told me to ask the course coordinator, Dr.Alan whether we will have the chance. Well, asking the course coordinator will sure become a futile attempt. Since Dr.Hii is the one in charge of industrial training and she herself has no idea about my enquiry, how can I expect Dr.Alan to give me a positive response? Well, Dr.Hii should not be the one that take the whole blame. It should be the whole management of UTAR to take it for coming with this double standard practice.

Why do we need to take this subject?! I can still understand and accept with huge amount of flaming anger in heart if the reason given is "You have to take this subject as a prerequisite to complete your degree course,or else you will not be able to graduate".

But please don't tell me that it is to instill patriotism bla..bla..bla.... Don't bullshit! Save it for your own ass! Don't give that kind of stupid reason because you yourself know that teaching this subject will not bring us any further in loving this country. I am not saying I am being disloyal to this country. I am just being realistic.

I am not sure whether my G3 groupmates will agree with my stand. Some may think "Yahoo! I can take a long break and relax my heavy arses." Some may think " What for going to that industrial training? We won't get good pay. It's just a chance for people to utilise us as cheap labour". Some may even think "Well, I don't plan to work in this life science-based industry anyway, I am just here to take a degree..that's all..So no need for me to go for training". Or you may find someone could be saying "I rather earn more pocket money in this three months by working part-time which pays better".
Well,anything is possible. I do not know whether they will think in this way. It is just a mere assumption.

Since I am not able to go for training, I planned to work part time. Unfortunately, the flip-flop management changed the timetable twice, making my chance to work virtually gone. Thursday and Friday, both 2-5pm.. So who would wanna hire someone to work if he has to absent on Thursday and Friday. Due to that, I have to let go my chance to work part time in Resort World Bhd. Urgh the pain is still there..Seeing an opportunity to work in a reputable MNC gone just like that is simply unacceptable.

I just hope that this subject will not be a boring subject ( but many told me it is). I hope I can still find a job to earn money for my own wealth collection project..Part 2 coming soon

What a pity..What a loss..What a waste

2008-10-04T11:50:00.000+08:00

A picture depicting an irony of the past and the current

What an irony of the past and the current. Few weeks before this occured, we were still discussing well about the group report. We were still be able to sit together in the same table for Pizza Hut lunch in Jusco Seremban 2 during the Yakult trip. We were still enjoying the Eason Chan "Don't Want to Let Go" Album Promotional Show in TARC together.

What a pity.. What a loss.. What a waste.. and I call it a tragedy. Both of them were truly good friends of mine until it happened. It also turned up to be the final straw for both after so many events and issues that they felt have made them unhappy. Both decided to go their own way and give up our friendship.

Our friendship is kinda short but I feel so happy to have them as friend albeit it was cut short. Our friendship actually started when we joined UTAR. But we do know each other during our time in TARC. Some called both of them 'lesbian' as they are very close to each other intimately in which at the end, it turns out to be untrue. We just did not have the chance to develop the friendship until we came to UTAR. Together with my best friend, Kaiyik, we helped out each other and cooperated together in many occasions for group assignments or group reports.

I must say that the second year first semester in UTAR was extremely tough and difficult. I had to adapt to new environment and started all over again after transferring from TARC. The process of adapting depressed me and sometimes I had to fend to myself but nevertheless, I was a born fighter and hate to lose and hate to give up. I do not like to be just ordinary and do not like to be easily satisfied with what I have. I'm serious in my work too. I will do everything my best and will try to score very good marks for all my assignments and examination. Eventually, I adapted to UTAR although I still think that I have never actually felt happy (the REAL HAPPY) ever since I joined UTAR.

Probably, these characteristics of mine do not bode well with many people including both of them that worked together with me. Some felt I had an attitude problem and this caused many to be unhappy or may even cause them to FEAR me (this came from certain feedback I received). Regarding the so-called "my attitude problem", I will talk about it further in another posts. I would love to talk more about the 'tragedy' that occured.

Anyway, I have to admit that there are times, I did make both of them to be unhappy working with me. Kaiyik had adapted to working with me and he knew quite well. Therefore, he will still work with me even though he is unhappy because he knows what I am up to. So, I believe both had consulted with Kaiyik before this occured. I do not mean that Kaiyik was the one that break off our friendship. Instead, I believe that both asked him about me ,about my attitude.. I do not mind Kaiyik told them through his perspective especially it is of unfavourable view to me. No one can question his right to speak his mind as long he does not go further to defame me using unscrupulous and false accusations. After all, it is both of them that decided their own course of actions, not me and not Kaiyik can influence them.

I apologized to both before and I do believe they accepted it. The wound was actually healed however, the scar was still there. The 'scar' reminded them of what happened in the past until all the unhappy experiences accumulated together in them.

On the very eventful date of Friday 15 August 2008 after completing our Principles of Biotechnology midterm test, my G3 group leader informed me that both of them was barred for Organisation and Human Resources (OHR) final paper. After I knew about that, I took an initiative as a good friend and also as a fellow classmate in OHR class to inform them immediately via SMS.

And this act of a good friend turned into a disaster. Here are the SMSes that I sent and received on that day.

Sent:
"Bad news! Ying li and u got barred for Ohr ..ah neh said he saw in office list..he said hav 2 talk 2 dr.alan" (09:15:15 am)

Received:
"haiz,v can predict it d la coz u hav few tims forget2sign 4us d" (09:22:16 am)

Sent:
"Wa..lk dat meh? I did sign 4u once during tut. I tink it's bcoz of lec..dat day v convo din sign" (09:22:51 am)

How are you going to interpret this SMS conversation, I leave it to you. Apparently the act of a good friend to inform them immediately was not well-received by both. The explaination towards her reply wasn't convincing enough. The next day, I started to realise that this doesnt look good at all. I asked
them at the end of the Saturday OHR lecture how is it going and are you guyz ok. But I got a very cool reply from one of them saying, "Well, if it is like that, what can we do?".

Things became much clearer on the next Monday when they did not want to work with me during the microbiology lab practical. They approached Ya Peng (a girl who had a friendship with me turned into normal classmate relationship) to work together. I told Kaiyik who stood beside me about this. I laughed while telling him. I felt this as the biggest 'joke' of the day that hit me.

"Hey, I think both had boycotted me", I said.

I did approach the girl who has a more softened approach compared to another one. I asked her "are you guyz ok and do you need any help? I have a sample letter and I can forward to you at anytime as the letter of explaination to Dr Alan". She told me it was ok and they had prepared the letter earlier.

On that night, I saw their MSN personal msg.. One of them wrote: "If you cant do it, dun promise it..no wonder you are alone..I won't trust u anymore"
Another wrote rather complicatedly and long but very interesting at the same time. I'm kinda forgotten what she wrote but it was aimed at me, something on understanding me i supposed.

In response to them,my MSN personal msg sounded in this way: "If u feel this is for the best for u,juz do it. No one will regret and no will feel lonely. U r always the nice fren dat I know"

I can choose to apologise to them to end this all once and for all. However, from what I know this had gone far worse than I could expect. They will not accept my apology for now. So I chose to let them cool down and concentrate on their exam.

So, what I can see is that people will sure blame me for being the culprit. They will resort to the simplest solution and thinking in a 'holier-than-thou' approach that I am not smart enough to be a good friend and not signed for them while they are absent in class.

Oh yea,hell right. Allow me to explain this.

I actually signed for them for few times during OHR tutorial when they were absent, not just once. I signed for them whenever they asked me to do so when they wanted to skip the tutorial classes.
I suspect the main cause of them being barred is due to their lecture attendance. Every Saturday morning, I reached school very early while they were always 5-15 minutes late for the lecture. The lecturer, Mr. Chee would distribute the attendance list before the lecture commences. As such, I would be the one of the first to sign it. If they were absent without letting me know on the first hand, how do I know whether I suppose to help them sign or not.
If you expect me to be a little bit smarter by signing for them when I did not see them in class, hey how the heck I know that they may not turn up for class. After they always came late and would sign the list later on. Besides, after I signed the list, I must pass it to the other students so that they can sign as well. I cannot hold the list and wait them arrive to sign it.
Once everyone had signed, the list would be returned to Mr. Chee. So after everyone had signed and both of them still had not appeared, do you expect me to go down and ask Mr. Chee for the list so that I can sign for them? This is totally impossible and foolish. He saw me signed mine and will he even trust the lie I could choose to create saying, 'my friends hadnt sign it so I got to bring the list to them' everytime they were absent without telling me.
Never forget that three of us skipped the lecture once before due to TARC Diploma Convocation.
Last but not least, I believe that your own attendance is your own responsibility. You pay for every single class you are required to attend.So,attend it and do not push this responsibility to others. I can sign for you but please let me know in the firsthand.

To Yee Wei and Ying Li, both of you are truly amazing friends to me. Both of you had helped me alot and I thank you. Plus, both of you have high work rate and are professional during the completion of our final group report even though the 'cold war' had just started at that time. Thank you so much and it's really wonderful that I can know you.

Let the journey towards the Reconciliation of Truth begins

2008-10-04T08:04:00.000+08:00

Finally a blog belonging to myself has surfaced and will begin its journey towards the RECONCILIATION OF TRUTH.Why blogging? Why don't you just use other more conventional methods to achieve what you want? Is it because other people own their own blog and you have the itch to start one? To that question, partially yes..

Well,blogging has became a trend, an outstanding trend I would say. I chose blogging because the cyberspace shows no discrimination. Freedom of speaking and expressing opinion is stronger and the cyberspace respect true democracy, unlike the faux pax democracy practised by the current Malaysian government. In short, I'm just trying to make good use and benefit from this cyberspace like many others would in this world.

Anyway anyhow, this blog will reflect what happened all this while in my life from my point of view. Some of my views are no holds barred and could sound offensive to certain sensitive parties. But I believe that under certain circumstances, you need to be honest and frank. Or else, an issue could become much worse. Trust me, it is never in my intention to bring in hostility and adversity or whatsoever. I'm a man of peace and love no hatred.

One thing came across my mind few weeks ago when I'm thinking of creating a blog. Who the heck is going to read your blog based on the current situation that befallen upon you, Kitson Liew (Call me DarkSide here,please)? Some of my friends have their own blogs but end up getting less and less reader with each post.
Frankly speaking, I'm expecting the same thing to happen to this blog. It may not even have a single reader. But who cares? I have no pressure at all to attract any readers. I will use this blog to vent out my feeling or possibly, frustation to ease my stress or whatsoever. I do not even mind whether to have any readers at all.

Nevertheless, I will still start my pilot project by informing some of my friends about my blog. That time, we are going to see the reactions towards the blog and also towards me. I welcome all comments whether it's good or bad or even favourable to me or not favourable to me. Till here, I rest my case.